my thoughts on future little ones

***EDIT: I am overwhelmed with the response from this post. I appreciate all your love and support. You are all so amazing. Thank you for all your sweet words. This was a hard post for me to write and I am amazed by the response. I wrote this for me. For me to finally put my thoughts in to words. All of your sweet words are just a bonus. You have made me feel oh so loved. Thank you! <3***




ok so i guess im all about the deep posts these days. here is another post about something i have been thinking about A LOT lately. 


i am sure i am not alone in noticing the amount of ladies who are preggers these days. there must be something in the water everywhere. ok, so as much as i honestly am happy for everyone who is pregnant. i can't help but be a little sad too. for the past month or two i have been so baby hungry. i am not really sure how to explain what im feeling but, i honestly feel like i am suppose/ready to be a mom. trust me i know it will be hard work, and its not all easy. so please, spare me the comments about how hard being a parent is. 


a few weeks ago we had general conference . the very first two talks were on children. no joke, it was actually pretty funny. i kept laughing and looking at dan. he kept telling me to stop. haha. anyways, as i listened to the talks all of them seemed to be about children and what we are suppose to teach them. it got me thinking about what kind of mom i want to be. which lead to think about how i want to be a mom so bad. 


we by no means trying to have a baby right now. dont get all excited. i know we have a lot we need to do in order to really be ready for this next step. with that said, i honestly believe that there is no RIGHT time for anyone to have a baby. it's not on our time it's on his time. him being God. only he really knows the right time. we can come up with all the excuses we want about why it's not the right time. when really, they are all crap. 


i love this quote from this last conference. 


"The creation of life is a great responsibility for a married couple. It is the challenge of mortality to be a worthy and responsible parent. Neither man nor woman can bear children alone. It was meant that children have two parents—both a father and a mother. No other pattern or process can replace this one." - Boyd K. Packer


with all this said, i know that it will happen for us when it's suppose to. i also know i can't be jealous or sad when i hear of someone i know who is pregnant. i need to be happy for them and understand that my time will come.  i will be a mom, someday. i will be able to love, teach, guide and cuddle my own little one someday. 


along with my desire to be a mom, comes alot of worried feelings. i worry people will judge me. worried they think i am too young or immature to be a mother to a child. i worry that people will be mean about this. i know that nobody's feelings really matter. having a child is decision that is between my hubby, God and i. nobody else's feelings matter. so, everyone who is reading this i hope you understand that and i hope that you can just support us when the time comes. 


when the time comes for us to add one more to our little family, i will embrace it with all my heart and cherish it. until then i need to remember to cherish these times i have with dan. as a young married couple i should be grateful for all the time we have together and for life we have. 


i cannot wait to have my own little. when the time is right. thank you for taking the time to read this and know i love each and everyone of you readers! xoxox